I read that in the winter of 1860, the United States was a house rapidly dividing against itself. As Southern states intensified their aggression and whispered of disunion, many in the North were paralyzed by a desire for peace at any cost. There was a prevailing assumption among Southern aggressors that the North would eventually fold, as it had during the Missouri Compromise of 1820 and the Compromise of 1850. They expected a lack of resolve; they expected the opposition to evaporate. They were not counting on men like James A. Garfield.
Garfield, who eventually became the 20th President of the United States, was a man who deeply deprecated war. He found no glory in the shedding of blood and no joy in the prospect of civil strife. But, as the shadow of conflict came slowly, he uttered words that perfectly encapsulate a philosophy of living that I think is very, very much as relevant today as it was on the days of the Civil War: “Of course I deprecate war, but if it is brought to my door, the bringer will find me home.”
To be “at home” when trouble knocks is not being in a physical building; it is a masterclass in the Stoic approach to life. It is the realization that while we can not control the guest who knocks, we have absolute authority over the state of the house they find when the door is opened.
The Illusion of the Empty House
To understand the strength of “home,” we must first understand what the aggressor expects. Whether it is a political rival, a toxic personality, or a sudden life crisis, “trouble” usually thrives on the assumption of vacancy, when we are not in control, in charge of our home, our space.
I once listened to a podcast, and it was said that when Julius Caesar crossed the Rubicon, he banked on the idea that Cato the Younger’s principles were merely intellectual ornaments and just head knowledge, just talks; that when the steel of the legions arrived, Cato would be out, fleeing to safety or negotiating his integrity for survival. Julius Caesar assumed the house was empty, but he was mistaken, because Cato was home, and his presence forced Caesar to confront a moral resistance that no army could truly defeat.
In modern life, we often play into this illusion; we live “away from home” when we outsource our happiness to external validation, when we let our values shift based on the current social climate, or when we avoid the hard conversations that define our boundaries. When trouble knocks on the door of a person who has no internal residence, that person evaporates; they panic, they compromise their core identity, or they become the very thing they claim to hate.
What it Means to Be “Home”
James Garfield’s “home” was not a physical location; it was a fortress of character. In the Stoic tradition, being home means being in possession of oneself. It is the state of Ataraxia, a lucid state of robust tranquility.
1. The Presence of Principles
To be home is to have your values sitting in the living room, visible and immovable. James Garfield did not want the war, but he knew exactly where he stood regarding the Union and human liberty. When the “bringer of war” arrived, there was no need for Garfield to scramble to find his convictions; they were already there.
“Don’t wait until everything is just right. It will never be perfect. There will always be challenges, obstacles, and less-than-perfect conditions. So what? Get started now. With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more self-confident, and more and more successful.” — Mark Victor Hansen.
At the core, everyone is trying to grow and improve in the four areas of wellness: mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual. Each of these components affects the others; that is why they share the potential to be interrelated. Every day as we progress and improve our core strengths, we become faster, better, and more intelligent. Do Better, Be Better. We get TOUGHER.
Continue Reading: Principles For Success: Develop Toughness and Build the Life You Want to Live
2. The Rejection of Victimhood
Notice that Garfield does not say, “If trouble knocks, I will be a victim of the door being broken.” He says the bringer will find him home, and this shifts the power dynamic. Trouble may initiate the contact, but the Stoic decides the nature of the encounter. By being “home,” you assert that your internal state is not a result of external circumstances, but a deliberate choice.
Do you find yourself often attributing and blaming other people or situations for your struggles? Have you experienced a time when you felt stuck, unable to progress because external forces keep you from progressing? If the answer to any of the above questions is “yes,” then you could be trapped in a victim mentality.
The concept of victimhood is a feeling of insecurity, which is the opposite of feeling in control and having autonomy. A victim is considered to be one who is subject to pain, harm, or suffering.
On the other hand, the opposite of a victim is a person or group that accepts responsibility for their actions and circumstances and actively seeks to overcome obstacles and challenges. This kind of mentality is characterized by self-confidence, strength, and determination.
Continue Reading: The Opposite of Victimhood: Victor Mentality | How To Overcome Adversity And Thrive
3. Readiness Without Aggression
There is a vital distinction between being a “warmonger” and being “ready for war.” James Garfield deprecated war, and a Stoic does not seek out conflict, nor do they find ego-driven pleasure in winning; however, the lack of a desire to fight is not the same as the inability to stand. The strength of “home” is a quiet strength; it does not need to shout from the rooftop to prove it exists; it simply answers the door when the time comes.
Peace is a noble pursuit and desired by most if not all, but it is rarely secured without cost. We most times think of peace as the absence of conflict, a calm state achieved through kindness, diplomacy, or surrender, but history, psychology, and even personal experience tell a different story: Sometimes lasting peace is not given; it is defended.
The ancient Latin phrase “Si vis pacem, para bellum” translated in English to mean “If you want peace, prepare for war,” may sound harsh at first, but its wisdom runs deep. Whether in nations, relationships, or our own inner lives, peace often requires strength, vigilance, and the willingness to confront threats before they grow.
The paradox of peace: Why true peace (tranquility) is not passive, how preparation is a form of protection, and how we must be willing to engage in battle, externally or internally, if we are to secure the peace we seek.
Continue Reading: If You Want Peace, Prepare For War
Building the Home
How do we build a life of a clear conscience so that we, too, can be “home” when life’s inevitable troubles arrive?
The Foundation: The Clear Conscience
You can not be “home” if your house is filled with the shadows of guilt or the clutter of dishonesty. A life of clear conscience is the bedrock of Stoic resolve. If you are hiding from your own mistakes or living a double life, you will naturally want to flee when a crisis demands your full presence. To be “A Soul Without Shadows” is to live with such transparency that you have nothing to hide from the bringer of trouble.
We live in an age of performance, we are coached on how to build our personal brands, how to optimize our LinkedIn profiles, and how to curate our Instagram feeds to project an image of success, happiness, and moral standing. We spend billions of dollars on skincare, fashion, and home decor to ensure that the “shell” of our lives looks impeccable. But, there is a quiet, internal metric of success that no one can see, but everyone feels: The state of the conscience.
The quote I recently encountered put it perfectly: “One of the most underrated ingredients for having a good life is a clear conscience. To know you are not out here doing people dirty, hiding who you are, or screwing people over lets you sleep peacefully at night.”
And this, today, is what I call the concept of a “Soul Without Shadows.” It is the state of being where your private reality matches your public reputation. In a world of chaos, where we often debate truth and struggle with the Empty Boat offenses of others, a clear conscience is the ultimate luxury; it is the only thing that allows for true, unshakeable rest.
Continue Reading: A Soul Without Shadows: Building a Life of Clear Conscience
The Walls: Emotional Boundaries
Being home requires knowing where you end and where the world begins, because if you allow the chaos of the news, the opinions of strangers, or the malice of others to occupy your mind, you are letting squatters live in your house. But building the strength of “home” means reclaiming your mental space.
The simple decision to say “No” is powerful and is often an act of bravery. To be productive, reduce stress, and avoid wasting time, it is essential to master the act of saying No, an art that many struggle with.
What’s the hardest part to saying “no? First of all, it could make people angry, hurt, or be disappointing to the person to whom you’re telling “No”, and this isn’t a very enjoyable job. If you’re hoping to collaborate with the individual in the near future, then you’ll want to maintain a positive rapport with the person you’re saying “No” to, and using the word “No” in the wrong manner could jeopardize this.
If you’re ever inclined to affirm “Yes,” be aware that you have immense potential in being able to say “No,” and sometimes, it’s the best option.
Continue Reading: The Power Of Saying “No” For A Less Stressful Life
The Watchtower: Premeditatio Malorum
The Stoics practiced Premeditatio Malorum, the premeditation of evils, and I recently listen to a message by my Man Of God, Pastor Chris Oyakhilome DSc, DSc, DD, titled Anticipating Evil, and as a Christian, I know God’s word is law and above everything else, and for the purpose of this article, I am saying there is a kind of similarity between Anticipating Evil and Premeditatio Malorum. The Stoics would visualize the knock at the door before it happened; they asked themselves: What if I lose my job? What if I am slandered? What if I face a health crisis? By contemplating these possibilities, the you ensure that when they do arrive, you are not caught in your pajamas, so to speak. You have already prepared your response.
When the Knock Comes
We all face “bringers of war.” It might be a legal challenge, a professional betrayal, or a personal tragedy. When it happens, the world watches to see if you and, in this case, the “opposition will evaporate.”
The South expected the North to fold because they saw the North’s desire for peace as a sign of an empty house, but they mistook kindness for weakness and patience for fear. Because when they found men like James Garfield, Abraham Lincoln, and Ulysses S. Grant, they realized that the house was occupied by a spirit, and souls that could not be evicted.
And so, my dearest reader, when trouble knocks at your door, do not meet it with agitated, worried, frightened, scared, terrified, or panic-stricken energy. Do not meet it with a list of excuses, but instead, meet it with the quiet, steady presence of someone who knows exactly who they are and what they stand for.
Let the trouble find you settled! Let it find you principled! Let it find you home!
Just as I asked myself just few seconds in the episode, Ryan Holiday went further to ask the exact same question, why should one do this? He talked about an exchange in Chicago, the new book by David Mamet (a fan of Stoicism), that captures the reasons well; where the characters, having found themselves on the wrong side of a mob war, are arming themselves and discussing where to hide a pistol for protection; then one reminds the other that “the one phrase you never want to use” when trouble arises, is “Wait here ‘till I fetch it.” Ryan Holiday went further to say in that episode that Marcus Aurelius would say something similar; that philosophy was designed to make us a boxer and not a swordsman, because a boxer is built with his weapon in hand(s) whereas a fencer has to fetch theirs.
And this was also one very striking part for me, your weapon ought to be built in your hands, the reason we practice this, ought to do this, the reason you need to build your weapon in your hands, day in and day out is to keep their lessons handy, not just in philosophy but every other area and in any field of our domain. Ryan Holiday went further to say that “we think about managing our tempers so that when we are provoked, we know how to respond. We make preparations for the twists and turns of fortune to make ourselves immune to the strokes of luck. We meditate on our mortality and the shortness of life in anticipation of that fateful day for us or for loved ones.”
Continue Reading: Why You Should Consistently Do The Work: Be The Boxer
Read Also: Be Aware, But Not Troubled: The Stoic Art of Peaceful Preparedness
Read Also: Refuse to Be Provoked: You Don’t Have To React To Everything
Read Also: The Unexamined Life Is Not Worth Living – Socrates
Conclusion
James Garfield’s life ended tragically short, but I believe his philosophy remains a blueprint for the modern soul. Building a life of clear conscience is not just about being good; it is about being stable. It is about creating an internal environment so solid that no external storm can blow the roof off.
And as you go about your week, ask yourself: If trouble knocked right now, would it find me home? Or would it find me chasing distractions, hiding from my responsibilities, or compromising my values for the sake of comfort?
The goal of the Stoic life is to reach a point where the bringer of trouble leaves that encounter more changed, as well-behaved and corrected, or at the very least knowing that they have no power to destroy your soul, your spirit, your home.
21 “When a strong man, fully armed, guards his own house, his possessions are safe.
22 But when someone stronger attacks and overpowers him, he takes away the armor in which the man trusted and divides up his plunder.
Luke 11:21-22 NIV
No one can enter a strong man’s house and plunder his goods, unless he first binds the strong man. And then he will plunder his house.
Mark3:27 NKJV
“Or again, how can anyone enter a strong man’s house and carry off his possessions unless he first ties up the strong man? Then he can plunder his house.
Matthew 12:29 NIV
